I want to tell you a brief story about my current status: I'm single, but I'm in no mental state to find a partner, even though I sometimes wish I had somebody alongside me.
I have been single for almost eight years as of writing this post. However, even after ascending from hitting rock bottom, I'm anxious to open my heart to allow someone new into my life because I fear (and know) it only takes one girl to ruin everything I had to rebuild. If you want to read about my past, then click here.
Here are 5 HONEST reasons why some men remain single.
I go to the gym four times a week and consider myself in great shape, but the mirror never reflects how I deeply feel inside. After years of low self-esteem and emotional neglect, I sometimes struggle to talk to girls even when they make it clear that they are interested in me.
We are entering a new chapter in a society where men, now more than ever, are opening up about their battles with mental health. We need to beat our demons before we start approaching you again, ladies.
LACK OF FINANCES
I'm a huge believer in the saying 'Health is Wealth', but having enough money in our wallets at the end of the month is equally as important, especially if we want to impress a woman. A man's wealth resonates with his social status and ambitions in life.
Does the average woman want to date an unemployed man living at his parent's house playing video games or an ambitious guy full of drive and determination?
Some men want to prioritize their finances and security before finding love. I'm one of them.
WE LOVE THE FREEDOM
When you are single, you are the master of your domain. I love doing whatever I want whenever I feel like it. I have complete control of my life, but it has taken many years to benefit from it. The lack of responsibility is comforting with time, too.
Being in a relationship requires commitment and selflessness. As for me, I'm at the stage in my life where I want to focus on myself before devoting time to somebody new.
STUCK IN THE PAST
I regretfully put my ex on a pedestal many years before removing her from it. I was still in love with a girl who no longer existed in my life, despite knowing she was already out meeting new guys. I won't ever be a person who jumps from one relationship to the next, but sometimes I wish I could do it. In comparison, I need to heal properly before opening up my heart again.
As time passes, it's hard not to reminisce and think about your ex. You can't erase love from someone who once shared your dreams, highs, lows and intimacy. You begin to miss them the longer you stay single and wonder if anyone can truly replace the times you had with your previous lover.
We all want a pornstar..
In all seriousness, some men fantasize too much. The minds of today's young men are poisoned by the crap we see on sites such as Instagram. Porn is also too easily accessible and puts an unfair expectation that women should act, look or behave in a submissive manner.
I go through phases where I like a particular type depending on my mood. One week it's blonde girls; the next is mixed-race girls, etc., but none of it matters if she doesn't have any values or morals.
The five reasons above are only a few of the many I relate to the most. Every man goes through different transitions in life. We're just not as open about it compared to women. I found happiness being single after going through the most turbulent period of my life alone, and I want to continue this journey until I genuinely want to settle down with someone.
Take care until next time.